You Have Never Had Taco Bell???
….. My friend Hillary asked as she picked me up at 10pm at the train station. She had kindly offered to put me up for the night and drive me to the Seattle airport the next day for my flight to Norway. As she had not had dinner she decided to drive through taco bell, one of her favorite guilty pleasures. She was horrified to discover that I had never had the sheer joy of experiencing one these tantalizingly processed delights. So, being game, I agreed to give it a shot, I mean it can’t be that bad, right? As I took my first bite of the crunchy taco, wrapped in the octagon shape of a soft taco, filled with ground beef (I think), sour cream, lettuce, tomatoes and some special cheese like substance, she casually mentions…. “it’s fine, some people do get diarrhea though”. Fantastic, less than 24hrs till a total of 15hrs of travel, including 2 flights, a bus and a train…..
The Morning After
So after indulging in a fair portion of the strange octagonal food like item, that I am still not certain what it was called, along with part of a large pepsi, and, just because it’s tradition when we get together, a strawberry daquiri with pineapple rum… I fell asleep.
After an early morning wake up call from the twins upstairs, I had my first bathroom run. Not too serious, at least as long as it doesn’t keep up.
Then a nice big cup of home brewed starbucks and a homemade waffle with syrup and marg…. this is going to be regretted eventually…. a couple more trips to the bathroom and off to meet some friends…
The Healthy Lunch Stop
We met my friends Alex and Matt, who had got married that weekend, so I could give personal congrats and bestow the gift of a handpainted bark painting from Mexico. We met at this charming, health conscious, gluten free place with great lemonade, sweetened with honey……
I think the last straw was the honey, the person makingthe lemondade must have thrown the entire honey pot in there and by the end of the 1hr lunch I had inspected the facilities twice and was experiencing cramps…. and only 4hrs till my flight!
Pepto To The Rescue
In between fits of giggles, my darling friend Hillary, agreed to stop at a walgreens so I could grab a few things and on the bemused recommendation of the pharmicist, who by the way had also made it through life without eating taco bell, a box of chewable pepto bismal.
2 tablets and 30min later the cramps started to subside, the automatic strategic planning for bathroom stops began to fade and we arrived at the airport just in time.
The Moral Of The Story
Don’t listen to your friends regarding taco bell, especially right before a long flight…. and on the off chance of a end of world cataclysmic event and taco bell is the only place with food…..always pack a box of chewable pepto!